My life wasn't supposed to turn out like this. It was supposed to be like Just Friends, When Harry Met Sally, Made of Honor, or Definately, Maybe. It was NOT suppose to be like My Best Friend's Wedding.
I had the beginning right. We were friends. I considered him to be the boy that I was closest to. He told me I would be great and believed in me. He refused to argue with me about the stupid things, but apologized when he knew he had hurt me. He made me hug it out. We would have heart to hearts and I would tell him how much I believed in him and knew he could be great too. There where times when he frustrated me to no end and I couldn't handle him. But, I could never stay mad at him for long. He just had a way of making me forgive him.
However, we did not share a kiss that started out friendly then got suddenly intimate. He did not have a book I had been looking for for years and then gave it to me and after I got mad at him for keeping it he did not say nice things to me to make me fall in love with him. And, he did not show up on my doorstep after humiliating me and tell me very very nice things like how he wants to have babies with me and marry me.
No, it went more like the My Best Friends Wedding scene. Julia is chasing Michael and Michael is chasing the girl he actually loves. Then Julia calls her gay friend and he says "who's chasing you?" Yes it turned out much more like that.
I am trying to not be self-pitying. I know my heart has not even begun to break in ways I have seen my friends hearts break. But, it still hurts.
It has been an exhausting week, and I even had Monday off! Next week it is all me in the classroom. I am actually ready for it. I feel like I need to lay down the law a little more so they don't take advantage, but I can do that. Monday night I was freaking out that I couldn't do this, and now I just can't wait to have my own classroom.
I move soon, like this weekend. Matt found a place that is really nice. My room is small, but I don't have to share it with anyone so it's not a big deal. Matt is giving me a desk too, which will be really helpful. Kate's parents are letting me use a bed and even offered bunk beds, so I might take advantage of that for when I have visitors :)
Anna's last weekend. I don't want to talk about it.
I heard this song on the way home from school:
Don't give me no lines and keep your hands to yourself.
I am exhausted. I can't believe we have only had two days of school this week and I am already so tired. I am fully in charge starting next week. I am nervous. Today I was doing a lesson on nouns and I just could not figure out how to explain them to the kids. I had to ask Mrs. Hobson to help me. I felt like a FAILURE!
I just hope the next 7 weeks go by fast so I can see my babies at the daycare! I miss them! I hardly ever felt like a failure there.
With all those people around how can I still feel lonely?
Sometimes I wish for a life that is bigger then mine.
My best friend and I have been best friends for 4 years now. It was Skating for Tukes our freshman year that we met. Our other friend Annie and I "skated" into Cory's room to find a hat to match the rest of my "skater cute" outfit. We didn't really hang out at Skating for Tukes, but afterward she came and stalked Ben with us... then we were basically inseparable from that moment on. I don't have a picture from that night with Annie :(
This is a picture from our 1 year anniversary. Sophomores. My hair is so dark! 
This is our two year anniversary. Juniors.
This is last year. Seniors. We missed Skating for Tukes because we were in Jamaica. So we celebrated at Lovers Leap.
This is the first year we wont be together on our anniversary. Skating for Tukes is tonight and Cory is stuck in Brighton for something that probably wont even be fun anyway. I guess we will celebrate when I see her Sunday! It has been way too long since I have seen my best friend!
Cory and I at Strawberry Hill (a day or two before we went there for brunch). Our Mary-Kate and Ashley picture as she calls it <3.
BFF.